His garden shed

Someone in Minnesota, searching Google for garden sheds, must have thought his luck was in when he came across Salut! Sunderland. “Shucks,” he may have thought, “what the heck is a sarka club website doing hawking off outdoor furniture? But hey, it seems a friendly enough site; they must know what they’re doing.”

Our hero, one Marvin Green, cleverly located the e-mail link and shot off his request:

Hello.
My name is Marvin Green and am from MN in the United States Of America and i will like to order some Garden Shed and i need Halls heavy-duty pent-roffed shed 8’x6′ (2.44 x 1.83m) with a single door a high-quality garden and i need The door height is 1.82m (6ft), and the eaves height ranges from 2.16m (7ft 1″) on the door side, to 1.81m (5ft 11″) on the lower side and the width of the door entrance is 60cm (2ft), And i will like you to give me the cost for Garden Sheds. Hope to know if you can Help me with this order …Well Hope to also know the Type of payment you do accept ….Thank you Very Much

God Reachly Bless You
Marvin Green

What a shame he went and spoilt it by mentioning money, doubtless to be followed – if we’d been daft enough to reply – by a message asking for our bank details. Trouble is, we’re already too engrossed with Nigerian multi-billionaires who want to deposit heaps of loot in the account to take on a garden shed order. However, if you have a garden shed with valuables in, you should consider buying some wireless home security cameras in order to stop thieves easily breaking into your shed and taking your tools and lawnmowers!

And we’ve been busy in other ways, accepting warm congratulations from all and sundry for Sunderland’s mighty victory at Villa.

Watch this space for an early blast from Pete Sixsmith’s Soapbox. Will it be gung-ho, or have a dollop of realism? That’s what I wanted to know, and Pete replied: “Full of shining optimism.” It will appear sometime between now (an hour or so into Man Utd v Liverpool) and midnight.

What a difference a good day out in Birmingham does for the spirits. And I bet if Pete had a garden shed, it would be bigger than Marvin Green’s. Then again, we know that garden sheds can range from small and functional to large and luxurious so who knows who’s would actually be better!

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