In prolific form (and on holiday, which explains it), Pete Sixsmith slots in an afternoon visit to the cinema to see the new film about one of our heroes…
One of the best ways to spend an afternoon when on holiday from work is to go to the pictures. There is a wonderfully decadent feel about slinking into a cinema on an afternoon when the rest of the world is out there making a living and I’m just making up time for my pension.
Last half term, I went to see The Reader, which I didn’t much care for. In fact, if I never saw Kate Winslet’s breast ever again, I would be a happy man, having had an eye full of then in this movie. I sneaked into a Silver Session for over 60s for this one and it was rather disconcerting to hear the male part of the audience rustling in their trouser pockets for a spare Wurther’s every time the well endowed Ms Winslet disrobed.
This time, I visited an out of town complex to see The Damned United. I read the book when it first came out and thoroughly enjoyed it and I was interested to see how an American director would deal with a quintessentially English story of two working class men (Clough and Revie) in the same job but with such different views on how it should be done.
Who are you? We’re Manchester United
It seems an awful long time ago. Peter Reid’s first season as a Premier manager of Sunderland. We had Man …
Soapbox: things can only get better
Desperate for an antidote to the blues inflicted by our wretched performance at Upton Park, Pete Sixsmith joined Quakers fans at Darlington v Wycombe Wanderers. He saw the sort of writing on the wall that threatens not only Darlo but Southampton and Charlton, and raises nervous questions about the fate of Sunderland, if relegated…
Forgive me for using this again, but there is a classic line in Fawlty Towers where O’Reilly, the useless Irish builder, tells Basil: “Cheer up, there’s always someone worse off than you.” To which Fawlty replies: “Is there? Well, I’d like to meet him, I could do with a good laugh.”
Life is grim for us Sunderland fans at the moment. The pronouncements coming from the Stadium and Ricky Sbragia’s office in particular, are as optimistic and upbeat as a missive from Eeyore the Donkey on how to be more miserable than ever before. But if it’s bad for us, it’s even worse for Darlington fans.
Soapbox: Hammer House of Horrors
As the season enters its final phase a depressed Pete Sixsmith witnesses not so much a horror show as a no show at Upton Park. Be warned: this is not for the faint hearted …
West Ham was my fourth visit to London this season. The first three journeys back up the A1/M1 were more than satisfactory and the talk on the coach was of moving up the league and even looking for a place in Europe. It was a different conversation this time.
The average age of the people who sit in our bit of the bus is 50+. They have been Sunderland fans all of their lives. If there is one thing we know, it is the stench of a team sliding towards the relegation trapdoor. The stench filled our nostrils as we travelled north and is still there this morning as we look at the league tables and the fixture lists.
Who are you? We’re the Hammers (2)
Canadians are priceless, even when they start out as Brits. So it is with the second of our West Ham …
Soapbox: wild gamble; sheer – er – desperation or inspired move?
With scrupulous even-handedness, Pete Sixsmith assesses events up the road…
A famous North Eastern club is in difficulties. They face dropping a division and possibly oblivion. Fans are up in arms. They see the only way out as appointing a figure steeped in the history of the club who may inspire them to avoid the plunge into the Great Grimpen Mire of a lower league.
Who are you? We’re the Hammers (1)
This was going to be a double header, an introductory piece by one West Ham previewing Saturday’s return to nailbiting football and a set of Q&As featuring another. But we should do each contributor justice and run them separately. Here’s the first, supplied by Ciaran Byrne*, who quite likes Mackems, thinks Mags petent plus haut que ses cul (look it up) and brings a first to the Who Are They? series: an invitation to a post-match gig featuring his punk/oi! band the London Diehards…
Have you been pleasantly surprised by the Hammers’ performance this season, or is it much as you expected?
Yeah, very surprised. I think a lot of people think Zola is the man behind it all but Steve Clarke is the unsung hero. I can’t remember a defence as good as this
one for around 20 years at West Ham. We’ve actually been able to hold on to some leads now which was always a major failing with West Ham over the years.
Should you have been in the Premier at all? Sheffield United might have a view on that, but what is your take on the Tevez affair?
Soapbox: Jonah Horan strikes again
With only international football available at senior level, Pete Sixsmith followed personal tradition and went in search of a decent Saturday game. He went in vain (I sensibly waited until Sunday and saw my daughter Nathalie score a brilliant goal for Acton Ladies during a (wo)man-of-the-match performance, as voted by teammates, that helped secure a 2-1 win over a club glorying in the name of London United). But back to Pete and his journey into the footballing void …
When you reach the age I am now at, (58 a couple of weeks ago), you know that the good friends you have will remain so until that great referee in the sky calls you to the dressing room. Hopefully, He of the omnipotent ways is not as clueless as the likes of Rob Styles and Steve Tanner – but that’s another story.
I have a few really good friends who I could count on in a crisis. They are the ones who would mortgage their houses to bail you when the internet poker sites will no longer take your credit cards or when the bank refuses you any more money to spend at will in Threshers.
Soapbox: shameless referees
Tanner a bag anyone? Pete Sixsmith was not impressed by the refereeing of one Steve Tanner as we slumped to yet another defeat, this time at Man City. Apologies for the delay in posting Pete’s thoughts – the Randall Roadshow (which, incidentally, found McCartney’s tug to be a stupid and unnecessary act) is a bit tied up preparing for departure from the Middle East…
This is how the conversation went at 3.15 on Sunday;
Steve Tanner: “Well, Mo, did he pull his shirt?”
Mo Matader; “Yes, Steve”.
ST: Did he prevent a clear goalscoring opportunity, given the fact that the ball was in the goalkeeper’s hands and Wright-Phillips was yards off it?”
MM: “I’ll have a think about that one Steve”.
Let’s hear it for the lasses
The Man City game was my last before leaving the home of City’s benefactors, Abu Dhabi, to return to Europe. I had hoped for a special performance to mark my final day, while here, of Sunderland football. It came, but not from the Lads…
That feels more like it. No more effete, elitist notions of 11th or 12th top safety. All thoughts of “moving up to the next level” put on hold. Another game + another display of kamikaze defending + another punchless quest for goals = another defeat = another desperate relegation scrap …
There’ll be plenty from Pete Sixsmith on all that. So let’s get in first by congratulating Sunderland Ladies – pictured above, courtesy of Sunderland WFC – on what The Guardian elected to call “the surprise of the season”: reaching the women’s FA Cup final with a 3-0 win over Chelsea at the Stadium of Light.
This line from the official site of the women’s team says it all:
Sun 22 Mar Chelsea H FA Cup Stadium of Light 2.00pm 3-0 Gutteridge; Williams (2)