Premier League

The Chapman Report from Arsenal: maybe Moyes had used the cattle prod

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not giving up

Pete Sixsmith’s season done, the baton is handed once again to Robert Chapman, ever present even though home games involve a 460-mile round trip. After the Swansea mess, he might have been forgiven for not bothering with the remaining away games, closer to home though they may be for him. He stuck to his principles and was pleasantly surprised at Arsenal, not by the predictable result but by the effort he witnessed from our side …

When we were finally relegated against Bournemouth the other week, my wife asked whether I would bother going to the remaining fixtures.

Even I, the eternal optimist, knew we were going to be relegated some time ago. I told her that as long as the team tried – by which I mean giving 100 per cent – I would carry on to the bitter end.

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Chelsea prize Guess the Score: ‘it’s our party, we’ll cry if we want to’

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Jake wills us to win, just for the fun of it

With apologies to the late Lesley Gore and the writers of her pop classic – it took no fewer than four of them: Walter Gold John Gluck Jr, Herb Weiner Seymour Gottlieb, and their song of teenage betrayal was elevated to new heights in the 1981 version of the non-Eurythmics, non-Sunderland Dave Stewart and Barbar Gaskin – Sunday afternoon is party time. Chelsea fans will be en fete, ours will make the most of their day, too, before taking their leave of the Premier League.

To adapt the song’s best couplet: Everybody knows where my Sunderland have gone/ But Judy (David Moyes?) left the same time

And here’s is a special prize edition of Guess the Score …

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Moyes on the boys v Arsenal: ultimately outclassed

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Moyes on the boys

John McCormick writes:

I wouldn’t have bothered putting Januzaj on, wouldn’t even have bothered telling him to turn up.

But other than that, I can’t really disagree with David Moyes today, given that Arsenal really did need to win to give themselves a top four chance, and they really did have to make an effort to get that win.

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Sixer’s Sevens: Arsenal 2-0 SAFC. A smidgeon of pride

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Jake: ‘come on Jordan. Just give us one more season. Please’

Monsieur Salut writes: Pete Sixsmith has done with Sunderland for this season, at least as far as attending games is concerned. You will not see his seven-word verdict but Bob Chapman’s.

After the awfulness of the last home game, our Lads at least mustered defiance and occasional threat. Forget the overwhelming dominance of the stats – shots on goals, corners and so on. Arsenal were forced to fight for this win. Jordan Pickford was superb, Billy Jones stuck as well as anyone might to Alexis Sanchez and was perhaps unlucky that the Chilean scored both goals and Jermain Defoe ran and ran. Even Januzaj ran in his cameo substitute’s appearance. Effort and concentration of this sort, much more often, would have added some points to a miserable tally …

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Haway! It’s awards time again with Bournemouth, Middlesbrough, Swansea making early running

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Jake: ‘with thanks to all opposing fans who participate’

Monsieur Salut introduces our annual HAWAY awards, with thanks to the supporters of all clubs played by Sunderland in league and cup this season who contributed to the series …

Cinema does it with Oscars, BAFTAs, Cannes and the rest. Pop has the Brits and Grammys. Salut! Sunderland brings you the HAWAYS, honouring the best interviews with opposing fans – the Highly Articulate Who are You? awards.

We are delighted once again to have a trio of generous sponsors. The rough-and-ready shortlist is with judges but I shall extend the process this year to allow a popular vote, using the same criteria including the fact that my suggestions are intended as no more than a guide.

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Arsenal ‘Guess the Score’: just a matter of how many Defoe scores?

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Jake: ‘this is one I made now’

We all know relegated teams like to turn it on for the swansong. After the meekest of surrenders to Swansea, SAFC players – especially those with an eye on lucrative summer transfers – will accordingly raise their game at Arsenal. Two for Defoe, one more for Billy Jones as we romp to a 3-1 win. Mmm ….

Sunderland AFC: a club that can hire the dross we’ve seen hired and embrace CEOs and directors of football who bring only misery can still find the commercial nous needed to sack backroom staff and get rid of such a SAFC institution as the programme editor, Rob Mason.

We’ve plenty more to say, Messrs Short and Bain, so watch this space.

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A daughter asks: what is Jordan Pickford worth, should Liverpool buy him?

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He’s one of our own, but may soon be supporting us and not playing for us

We all know Monsieur Salut’s football-playing younger daughter Nathalie is not a Sunderland fan. OK, she quite likes us, maybe we’re her second team. She’s been dragged to see us a few times in her life. But her allegiance is Liverpool mainly because as a kid, she fancied John Barnes. So, what now for Jordan Pickford? We’ve all seen the crazy prices – crazily low as well as high – but what would you be happy to pay for him if your club was not Sunderland? ….

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Arsenal v Sunderland Who are You?: ‘acutely uncomfortable’ Moyes, faltering Wenger

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Jon Ryan: ‘Ozil and Sanchez would have fitted into the Invincibles’

Colin Randall writes: it is beginning to feel like a farewell. People supporting other clubs who have written, or been interviewed, in the past at Salut! Sunderland have been popping up again and this time it’s as we prepare to depart the Premier League. Will we have the stamina to find 46 ‘Who are You?’ candidates, plus fans of teams we meet for probably one round in each cup, next season? We’ll see.

Jon Ryan* is a friend, former colleague and lifelong Arsenal supporter. He misses the great occasions at Highbury, thinks the Emirates a great stadium as new ones go but little more than ‘part of the London entertainment scene’, and is worried about Arsène Wenger having been a great admirer. He’s been sympathetic all season towards SAFC but identified a need for change that hasn’t been forthcoming …

Naomi, a granddaughter already hooked

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Moyes on the Boys after Swansea cruise to victory: ‘SAFC deserved nothing’

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Moyes on the underperforming Boys

There really is little more to say. The best moments of the afternoon were 1) Rob Mason’s interview with Nick Barnes about being ‘let go’ by the club from his exemplary editing of the club programme (another rotten SAFC decision, but what a noble interview without a trace of bittneress) and 2) the sight of Bradley Lowery being carried on to the pitch beforehand by Jermain Defoe. For the rest, David Moyes got it right a couple of days ago – he and the players should have been hanging their heads in shame. Here are his usual post-match thoughts, …

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Sixer’s Sevens: SAFC 0-2 Swansea City. Bravo Rob Mason, shame on Sunderland

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Jake: ‘was that a whimper I heard? No it was nothing’

Monsieur Salut writes: Pete Sixsmith wondered at half time, Sunderland two down and looking like little boys lost, whether it was worth staying. He did. And continued to see a team devoid of leadership, character, flair or even – in many cases – passion. Embarrassing, Sixer said later. As bad as, if not worse than, anything he had seen in 53 years supporting our club. His seven-word verdict below is unchanged from half time, after which we had a clear penalty denied and a good chance spurned by Billy Jones but never truly seemed able to save the game …

Having led us to this sorry moment, our esteemed owner Ellis Short and his chief executive Martin Bain were watching from the stands. They, like the manager and players, should have been hanging their heads in shame – and not least because of their thoroughly rotten decision to get rid of the SAFC programme editor Rob Mason, a wonderful club historian and servant who deserved better than this shabby end (his pre-match interview with Nick Barnes oozed class, dignity and total lack of rancour) …

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