When supporting Sunderland means never being happy

With unforgivable lack of loyalty, my younger daughter supports Liverpool. She was born in Bristol, but that’s no excuse.

Even less loyally, she bought my wife as part of a birthday present a copy of the book How To Wean a Man Off Football, by Ronni Ancona and Alistair McGowan. What is she trying to do to my life?

And on page 38, the conversation goes a little like this:

Ronni:

You can’t simply put the fact that men look happier now than they did in pre-Industrial Revolution portraiture down to the advent of football.

Alistair:

No, but football has made men happier. It certainly distracts them from the sadness of life – and rickets.

Ronni:

Ali, that’s rubbish. Most men are made unhappy by football. My friend Jenny says she checks the football results at the weekend before going to work on the Monday to see what sort of mood her boss is likely to be in.

Alistair:

Who does he support?

Ronni:

I don’t know. Sunderland, I think.

Alistair:

Trust me. He’s generally going to be in a bad mood. She doesn’t need to check the papers.

M Salut wishes it to be known that pocket money is suspended for the next 10 years.

Monsieur Salut

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7 thoughts on “When supporting Sunderland means never being happy”

  1. In a classic episode of “Whatever Happened to the Likely Lads?” Terry is reminding Bob of a girl they knew at school. He says something like, “You must remember her. Lived above a fish and chip shop. Her mam was in the Salvation Army and her dad was a Sunderland supporter. Not a happy family.” I may not have the words exactly right but despite my alliegiance I still smile when I think of it!

    🙂

  2. When I was much younger I had a newspaper cartoon cutting depicting a young man talking to his future father in law and telling him that it’d be no sweat supporting a wife ’cause he supported Sunderland for years. The “prophecy” still holds!

  3. I will be very happy when Ellis short sacks steve Bruce and I hope the speculation is true and a proper manager is installed Martin o Neil and puts us where we belong and plays constrictive football roll on good times ahead

  4. It’s very true. I’ve ruined many a weekend in my household over the years due to the football. I’d like to think I’m mellowing as I grow older and *ahem* wiser but I must say, after the defeat at home to the mags this year I was positively boiling. It can’t be good for us!

    What’s more, it’s amazing how much time football manages to consume out of my life. I attend every home game and the odd away so that counts out the majority of Saturday’s/Sunday’s from August until May. It’s even more worrying how much time I spend reading up on the club and posting about the club on various internet messageboards. If I used 10% of that time to learn say…the harpischord I’d be like a modern day Mozart.

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