With unforgivable lack of loyalty, my younger daughter supports Liverpool. She was born in Bristol, but that’s no excuse.
Even less loyally, she bought my wife as part of a birthday present a copy of the book How To Wean a Man Off Football, by Ronni Ancona and Alistair McGowan. What is she trying to do to my life?
And on page 38, the conversation goes a little like this:
You can’t simply put the fact that men look happier now than they did in pre-Industrial Revolution portraiture down to the advent of football.
No, but football has made men happier. It certainly distracts them from the sadness of life – and rickets.
Ali, that’s rubbish. Most men are made unhappy by football. My friend Jenny says she checks the football results at the weekend before going to work on the Monday to see what sort of mood her boss is likely to be in.
Who does he support?
I don’t know. Sunderland, I think.
Trust me. He’s generally going to be in a bad mood. She doesn’t need to check the papers.
M Salut wishes it to be known that pocket money is suspended for the next 10 years.