Soapbox: the problem of premature speculation

Pete Sixsmith is feeling contrite, having been lured by a newspaper headline into thinking Younes Kaboul’s transfer to Sunderland was in the bag. Salut! Sunderland is almost past caring whether he comes or not. Having beat the mighty Cobh Ramblers 4-0 away last night, and signed the most proficient spitter in the Premier League, do we actually need him? And wouldn’t we have to insist on chucking his agent Rudy Raba into the North Sea as a condition of the transfer? No matter, Pete welcomes the moves Keano has made in the market….

Sorry, I got the Kaboul one wrong
and he hasn’t signed yet. I must admit that I read it through a beery haze after several pints of Deuchars and I was so excited about the arrival of the man with bigger underpants than Oliver Hardy, that I had a bout of premature speculation.

Anyway, we can welcome Pascal Chimbonda and look forward to seeing a step over and dummy competition between him and Nyron. He impressed me when I saw him at Wigan early in the 15 point debacle – remember, the game where Breen and Davies put down a marker for the season by giving away a penalty in the third minute.

He’s done well at Spurs and he should prove to be a useful acquisition.

Interesting to see that one of the Spurs fans who contributed said he was a centre forward waiting to happen.

An acquaintance of mine who is a Gillingham fan said that Nyron started out as a No 9.

Maybe Keano is going to pair them up front and play Murphy and Chopra at centre half. Stranger things have happened. Ken Knighton once played Gordon Chisholm as an orthodox left winger and I remember McEnemy giving Benno a game wide left at Barnsley.

I arrived home from my wee Scottish tour to see that we were in talks with El Hadji Diouf which I found interesting.

At Bolton in April, he was the only player on the field who could actually control a ball and then use it in a positive manner unlike his team mates who did a passable impersonation of Castleford Tigers on an average day and our lot, who gave an equally passable imitation of Shildon Sunderland Supporters FC after a lot of beer. I think he will be an asset but no more premature ejaculations of delight until his signature is on the contract (the signing was completed after Pete filed this piece…ed).

Scottish lower league football continues to be a delight unless you happen to be a Montrose fan and see your team lose their first competitive game 6-0 at Peterhead or poor old John Penman and 400 other Ayr fans who saw East Stirling score twice in the last five minutes to put them out of the “diddy diddy cup” (c. J Penman).

But the greatest pleasure came on the trip home with a beautiful drive down the A68 in golden sunlight and the chance to taunt a Mag at the Shell garage in Jedburgh. It made an old man very happy!

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