Forget Arsène Wenger’s woes – ha’way the Lads (and Arsenal!)

Who, apart from Mme Wenger, really cares if Arsène has a mistress?

He is French, after all. Very, well Alsacien but Alsace is French just now, too. Is it not the Frenchman’s birthright, even republican duty, to have a lady on the side?

When the socialists introduced the 35-hour week in France, some people would use their spare hours for afternoon trysts in hotel rooms before heading home. Les cinq-a-six – 5pm to 6pm – became, if it was not already, a phrase to cover such extramarital activities.

I am a journalist but would not be sorry if publishing such material as the Sun has today, about a public man’s private life without a scrap of public interest (as opposed to interest on the part of the public) in the disclosure, became illegal unless all relevant parties inexplicably wanted the publicity.

And as for the more important matter of Sunderland v Stoke, our Stoke City previewer Stephen Foster – read him by clicking here – has tongue-in-cheek predicted a Darren Bent hat-trick. It would need to be tongue-in-cheek if the text message I just received saying Bent is out with a hamstring injury is true.

Sunderland fans expect a nervy display and just hope for a win from somewhere, anywhere, anyone. While praying that Kenwyne doesn’t return to haunt us.

Salut! Sunderland may well be running late today. Bear with us …

ps It goes without saying we’d also like Wenger’s team to wallop Newcastle tomorrow.

Monsieur Salut

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