Stoke City’s man of letters: ‘Kenwyne was always one of ours’

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Time, as we said, to move on. There’s another important game looming: SAFC v Stoke City on Saturday. Stephen Foster*, the author of two classics among “my club” football books (buy them at the best prices by clicking here), is another great capture for the Who Are You? series. Stoke through and through, he writes with the passion and wit that appeals to fans of other teams: look at the acclaim he won for She Stood There Laughing and the follow-up, on City’s first year back in the top flight, … And She Laughed No More. Welcome to Salut! Sunderland, Stephen (or Steve as he was for the first of those books thanks to a publisher’s error) …

Salut! Sunderland: you wrote our first question for us, Stephen: “What’s it like having half a side made out of Sunderland cast-offs representing Stoke City?” Apart from – or even including – Tommy and Kenwyne, is that how you see them?

No, not really, once you’ve got players they become yours, don’t they (unless you actively loathe them). But sometimes getting on for half our starting eleven have migrated from one set of red and white stripes to another which is a bit much: Tommy, Collins/Higginbotham, Deano, Rory, Kenwyne. The greatest contribution has come from Delap, no question, he was the key unit of the Pulis Method in the first Premier League season, at the outset of which, to be fair, everyone was predicting we’d ‘do a Derby’. The full backs are fine, the ‘keeper is solid, Whitehead is one of those players I just can’t see the point of. I think of Kenwyne a bit more as “one of ours” anyway since we had him on loan (from Southampton) for a couple of months in the Championship. He was the archetypal Bambi on Ice then; living up on Wearside certainly put some beef on him. He’s started off brilliantly, scoring in four consecutive games with his head, though he did have a muted and subdued match against Man United. We’ve been warned about that tendency from both your fans and your manager and I have to say he didn’t look up for it when he was confronted by the best centre back pairing he’s encountered so far in Ferdinand and Vidic. Vidic knocked him about which he didn’t seem to like. I wonder if he’ll do the curse of the ex against you…

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The Newcastle mauling: change or go, Brucey

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Colin Randall writes: on balance I would have preferred the post-St James’ Park inquest series to end on the relatively upbeat note – OK, non-suicidal note – struck by Malcolm Dawson yesterday (click here to see). But Steve Bruce is enough of a pro to have known calls for his head would inevitably follow such a disgrace as was witnessed on Sunday. Fans are split. Salut! Sunderland writers, as well as its readers, are probably split. Does he, as I believe, deserve to be judged on a longer period than 90 torrid minutes in Newcastle? Or is he a Kenwyne Jones blinder away from the sack? Lee Nichols*, writing here for the first time, was a doubter from the start …

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The Newcastle mauling: lapping up the news, good or bad

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Our inquest on the Tyne-Wear tragedy is nearly over. Will the verdict be death by misadventure, suicide or unlawful killing? That’s for you, collectively, to judge. We have one more piece to run in our series of articles, by different writers, on the derby fallout. That will appear tomorrow. Meanwhile, what has it all meant for Salut! Sunderland? …


Is there something about a really bad event or setback that makes us all gloom junkies?

Newspapers – as I should know – have always been more to do with bad news than good. Entrepreneurs who tried to launch good-news-only alternatives ended up broke. TV news bulletins are predominantly filled with what is evil, contentious or sad in the world.

And Salut! Sunderland, after one terrible performance by SAFC and a catastrophic result that ends a moderately encouraging start to the season, has never been busier. I was going to say “more popular” but that doesn’t somehow seem the right phrase.

Mrs Logic gets the gates back to normal

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The Newcastle mauling: it’ll be all right in the morning

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After the nightmare, we wake up. Malcolm Dawson, entering the witness box of the Salut! Sunderland inquest, urges caution and a sense of proportion …

OK so the performance at Sid James’ Park was abysmal. We were trounced deservedly by a side that performed much better on the day, that were better prepared, both tactically and mentally and who showed more energy and commitment. In short a team that were up for it.

But this is not the time for overreaction and knee jerk responses in our camp.

Five one defeats are not good. Obviously! Five one defeats should give cause for concern and give rise to time for reflection. Obviously!

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The Newcastle mauling: worldly advice for Steve Bruce

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Since the Nightmare of St James’ Park, advice on what Bruce should do about Sunderland – or Short and Quinn should do about Bruce – has been flowing thick and fast. There’s been plenty from supporters based around the world as well as those enduring the reality of bragging rights being invoked closer to home. The inquest continues here with Bill Taylor offering Bruce tips from his Canadian exile on the identity of his next captain …

“Obeisant” isn’t a word you come across in everyday conversation. Not the kind of conversations I have, anyway.

My on-line dictionary defines it as “dutiful or submissive behaviour with respect to another person; bending the head or body or knee as a sign of reverence or submission or shame”.

Kind of like what Sunderland did at St. James’ Park on Sunday.

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The Newcastle Soapbox: demolition derby diminishes Bruce

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Long years, decades even, of disappointment and underachievement have made most Sunderland fans realists. Painful as it may be to face up to this, we were outclassed on the day by a Newcastle United team that deserved its massive win as much as we deserved (again, we hope, on the day) to have our quality – and yes, Steve Bruce’s tactics – exposed as woeful. A forlorn Pete Sixsmith gets it off his chest as an alternative to trying in vain to sleep …

Well, I didn’t see that coming. I thought there was a chance of us losing but not like that. Two average sides, one lightweight but with a sound defence and the other rather slow and ponderous with a tendency to concede goals at home; it looked like a 1-1 or 2-1 to me.

But 5-1? The result did not flatter them. There are no excuses to be made – we can’t say that the ref was useless, the goals were offside, they got lucky bounces. They were streets, miles, light years ahead of us in tactical nous, determination and ability.

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Sunderland’s Hedley gets Tyne-Wear derby winner. Wigan win too

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Not too many rose to the bait of a modest prize for memories of, or thoughts on, past Newcastle-Sunderland encounters. Even fewer Mackems will have the least desire to remember anything from yesterday’s apology for a Sunderland performance.

But we launched a competition so there has to be a winner of one of the books shown.

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Newcastle (3) 5 Sunderland (0) 1: the shambles and the shame

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When a contributor reckoned at Salut! Sunderland last week that we might be in for a hammering at St James’ Park, he was shot down in the nearest thing to flames we get around here.

Well, it this wasn’t a hammering, we want to know what it was. Pete Sixsmith’s will doubtless expand on his tale of woe tomorrow. This was today’s diary of gloom (with interjections from the Blackcats list). It starts with gentle banter before descending into the darkness …

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