Who Are You? - SAFC Blog

SAFC vs Southampton Who are You?: ‘it was always an 8-0 game’

May 1, 2015April 30, 2015 by Colin Randall

You’d expect any Southampton supporter to be pretty cocky going into this weekend’s game at the Stadium of Light, with only woefully misfiring relegation fodder standing in the way of another good result for slick southerners. Southampton’s season has defied all logic, after the turmoil of last summer, and shocked the supposed Premier League elite. So perhaps we should respect Paul Stewart*, a Saints nut and pal from Paris days and emphatically not the Paul Stewart who missed a sitter for SAFC when we had to win at Wimbledon on the last game of the 1996-97 season, for exercising a degree of restraint in his short and to-the-point ‘Who are You?’ interview. But for once, I was relieved not to see a scoreline prediction …

Stoke City Who are You?: Denis Smith ‘proud to have managed SAFC’

April 23, 2015April 23, 2015 by Colin Randall

Denis Smith: two Sunderland promotions cannot be bad

Salut! Sunderland likes occasionally to pull an unexpected gem from the ‘Who are You?’ hat. The ‘ordinary’ fans are just as good, often better, but it’s heartening from time to time to have celeb supporters, former players, noted authors, church leaders, broadcasters and, of course, former managers. Denis Smith never played for Sunderland but he can look back with pride on his achievements as our manager. He’s also Stoke City through and through; we must thank John Ruggiero, secretary of SCOBA, the Stoke City former players’ association (find it at Twitter: https://twitter.com/SCOBA1863), for persuading him to enter so gamely into the spirit of the series. Let’s hope his prediction of points plural for SAFC comes true. Pete Sixsmith joined M Salut in conjuring the questions …

Crystal Palace ‘Who are You?’: Kellie Shirley’s racy scenes with Morrissey and nightmare in Liverpool

April 9, 2015April 9, 2015 by Colin Randall

Jake wants answers ... — Jake wants answers …

Kellie Shirley‘s public may know her best as Carly Wicks from Eastenders but she’s been in so much more, from Dr Jekyll & Mr Hyde and The Office to Twenty Thousand Streets Under the Sky with lots of stage work, too, at the Royal National Theatre and Royal Court. If you have watched Soccer AM and listened to TalkSport, you may know Kellie is also a passionate Crystal Palace fan. Read more about her work below*; she’s heavily involved in charity work, campaigning for Mencap and acting as patron (with Richard Wilson, aka Victor Meldrew, who should support Greenock Morton – and did until he got sucked into brand allegiance to Man Utd) to a dance group for disabled young people. We’re delighted to welcome her to the ‘Who are You?’ hot seat …

Sunderland vs Newcastle ‘Who are you?’: not quite ready to forgive Colback

April 2, 2015 by Colin Randall

Jake: 'and some of them can spell boycott' — Jake: ‘and some of them can spell boycott’

The French Connection strikes again. Monsieur Salut is no more French than Lee Cattermole but has a French wife and city-in-law and spends a lot of time in France. Now our associate editor John McCormick turns out to have a half-French nephew, Anthony Petit*. Despite the name, Tony probably isn’t little at all; he certainly isn’t a Sunderland supporter. To adapt our old Eric Roy chant, ‘C’est Ooh Agh, c’est ooh agh, je suis un Mag y’naagh’. In remarkably good English – his mother’s from Birtley and he has some choice words for Mike Ashley – he upholds the tradition of cracking Who are You? interviews …

West Ham ‘Who are You?’: on Advocaat, Big Sam and Boleyn farewells

March 19, 2015March 19, 2015 by Colin Randall

Jake : 'we have ways of making them talk' — Jake : ‘we have ways of making them talk’

The air of collective pessimism that descended on Sunderland supporters last weekend may have been shifted a little by Dick Advocaat’s appointment but has hardly gone away. He will pick up a hefty bonus if he keeps us up but must inject life and desire into players who have let us and themselves down all season. It remains a tall order. When you get to the ‘who’s going down?’ question in this interview with Gordon Thrower, deputy editor of the West Ham fan site kumb.com (as in Knees up Mother Brown), you get his drift from the reply: ‘Leicester, QPR, er, hmmmmmm’. And we can hardly blame him (he was writing after Villa but before Poyet’s dismissal and his thoughts on that, and Advocaat’s appointment, came as a follow-up). Welcome back, Gordon – we just hope we’re still around to seek out a Hammers fan for this exercise next season …

Aston Villa Who are You?: ‘my poor dog Bozzie’s divine intervention vs WBA’

March 11, 2015March 11, 2015 by Colin Randall

Some things matter more than football. Howard Hodgson, a man with of impeccable credentials* as a Villan, almost gave Aston Villa’s the midweek Premier game vs WBA a miss because his faithful friend, an Agbonlahorish hound named Bozzie after a certain ex-Villa goalie, was put down that day.

He went anyway but is sure he knows who Tim Sherwood must have had in mind when saying someone in heaven had looked down kindly on Villa that night. Bozzie was up there in the clouds, willing on his master’s team to win the game in the 92nd minute of stoppage time. Howard was back at Villa Park for the WBA cup game in time to duck the flying Albion seats and keep out of the way of pitch-invading idiots. He answered our questions, admirably, before that match so the relevant sections have been tweaked accordingly …

Hull City ‘Who are You?’: brilliant Brucey, enigmatic Allam, dance icon Elmo

March 2, 2015March 2, 2015 by Colin Randall

Here’s the place for some interesting thoughts on Hull City’s Sunderland connections. Brad Rial*, a Tiger with a platform (he’s a part-time trainee at the Hull Daily Mail), has a lot of time for Steve Bruce and a trio of ex-SAFC players at his club. He’s more than a little concerned about the deteriorating relationship between owner Assem Allam and the fans … oh, and he thinks we’ll lose at the KC but stay up …

Manchester United v SAFC Who are You?: ‘we don’t do romps any more’

May 13, 2015February 25, 2015 by Colin Randall

Jake : 'we have ways of making them talk - even if it's the same one each time' — Jake : ‘we have ways of making them talk – even if it’s the same one each time’

As every schoolboy knows, there are trillions of Manchester United supporters around the world and it is a gross calumny to suggest no more than about five per cent of them know where Manchester is. Salut! Sunderland has not been successful in its search for one of them to do Who are You? who has not done it before. Fortunately, my old pal Keith Hoggins* is brilliant interviewee and has come up with lots of new thoughts on a whole range of United, Sunderland and other issues.

Keith initially thought the game would end 0-0 but now goes for a narrow United win. A glance at the William Hill betting site will show you what most people, and therefore the bookies too, expect to happen. Louis Van Gaal may be having problems but United-style problems tend to be on a different scale to those experienced by Sunderland. …

West Bromwich Albion ‘Who are You?’: hoofball, Ideye Brown, Sess and Sunderland sausages

February 18, 2015 by Colin Randall

Kev Candon is a salt-of-the-earth supporter who has overcome disability to follow his club, West Brom, as loyally as most Baggies. He chairs the WBA Disabled Supporters’ Club but makes light of his own handicap to the extent of calling a book he wrote with two pals Five and a Half Legs Go Nationwide.

Bradford City vs SAFC Who are You?: fill in the gaps, Bantams!

February 13, 2015 by Colin Randall

Jake thought he had ways of making them talk

These are not the finest hours of the Who are You? series. First a QPR fan let us down after promising to deliver, though other Hoops supporters made up for it when we ran the unanswered questions anyway. Now, the Bradford City-supporting Waterloo Road actor Tom Milner* goes AWOL after agreeing to be the candidate ahead of Sunday’s 5th round FA Cup tie. His responses may still come and would, in that event, be added. But as he was asked for replies by Wednesday, and has not been heard from since Monday, this may be a fanciful hope. No hard feelings – he undoubtedly has a good reason – but it does illustrate the frustrations of the series.

Same offer as for QPR is extended to other fans of the Bantams. Enter your own answers to one, more or all the questions in the Comments section below and we will come up with a prize for the best (it may not change your life a great deal but will be Bradford-related and be OK for drinking coffee from) …