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And while we’re on the subject of bearing we need to move beyond the Lynden and Graham Gooch situation. Luckily, we have Pete Sixsmith to help us. Pete doesn’t just appear on TV (who else saw him on MOTD?) He doesn’t just deliver erudite summaries to the papers (and nor does he just deliver the papers). He’s also a bit of a historian, as he demonstrates in this wander through the genealogical archives of the North East:
Now that we have sorted the Lynden /Graham Gooch situation out, presumably to the satisfaction of Lynden’s dad and Graham’s wife, it is surely time to dispel a few more myths about players families;
1. Jordan Pickford’s great grandmother was NOT Mary Pickford, the actress who was dubbed “America’s Sweetheart.” She married Douglas Fairbanks and, along with him, Charlie Chaplin and the director D.W. Griffiths, founded the studio known as United Artists. Whether she visited Roker Park in order to watch Dave Halliday bang in the goals in the Roaring 20’s is a matter of some conjecture.
2. Donald Love is not the love child of American chanteuse Courtney Love and the former Yorkshire and England batsman Jim Love. Courtney spent most of her life in and around Seattle and who, despite what it says in Wikipedia was not “a massive Lads fan.” Jim, who was born in Headingley, preferred the oval ball to the round one. However, he was the coach of the Scotland cricket team so who knows………
3. Billy Jones is not the son of David Bowie, real name David Jones, the celebrated singer, actor and professional chameleon, who sadly left us in January. Had he been Bowie’s son, he would have been blessed with a name like Howie or Yowie and not a straightforward Billy.
4. Rees Greenwood is not at all related to the former West Ham United and England manager, Ron. The fact that Rees has curly hair while Ron’s hairline was receding is clear proof of this.
5. Lamine Kone is not the twin brother of Arouna Kone, the Everton and former Wigan Athletic centre forward. Lamine is a cultured, goal scoring central defender who wins headers and tackles with ease. Arouna is none of these.
Readers may be able to help me with some others. Was Jimmy Montgomery in any way related to Field Marshal Bernard Montgomery of El Alamein, the man who once said of homosexuality that
“that kind of thing may be tolerated by the French, but we’re British, thank God.”?
Could they help me clarify if former full back Ron Guthrie was in any way related to the celebrated actor manager, Tyrone Guthrie ? What about any link between Gary Bennett and Mr Bennet, the patriarch in Jane Austen’s biography of Nigel Farage, Pride and Prejudice?
If anyone can come up with any others, I would be happy to help sort them out.
22 thoughts on “Pete Sixsmith’s alternative “Who’s who””
I’m surprised to find none of you have mentioned Len Ashurst, who gave birth to a horse
Trevor Ford’s brother, Glenn, was a pretty decent actor, and tough – but not as tough as Trevor.
Was Dick related in anyway to the little barrow girl from Dublin, Molly?
From what I hear, almost everyone is.
Charlie Buchan’s brother wrote ” The 39 Steps “, and Richie Pitt’s great grandfather was the youngest ever Prime Minister.
Martin Scott’s granddad was a close second to reach the North Pole, and Cannonball Fleming’s brother wrote the Bond novels – his other brother discovered Penicillin.
Arthur Wright’s uncles invented the first successful airplane, and of course, Len Shackleton’s dad was another very famous explorer.
Billy Elliott’s son became a famous ballet dancer, and Colin Todd’s dad Richard, was one of our great actors.
Oh, and you can blame Oasis, on Patsy Gallacher, who aside from scoring in our 1937 cup final win over PNE, fathered Noel and Liam.
And Monty’s granda led the trops at El Alamein
An of course Jermaine’s great, great grandpa Daniel wrote Robinson Crusoe.
Despite the fact that former Sunderland wide man Carlos Edwards would often do a vocal impersonation of the call of the Scops owl in an attempt to disconcert opposing defenders, there is no truth in the rumour that he is the great grandson of impressionist Percy.
The fictitious Hispaniola is thought to have visited the mainland of South America but evidence can not be unearthed which proves either way if Paraguayan centre back Paulo da Silva is a direct descent of Long John, the man who gave his name to Argentina.
Whilst possessing a decent turn of pace the underachieving Liam Miller was not directly related to the Greyhound legend that was Mick the Miller, although he is thought to have once owned a whippet called Brian.
Although he is supposedly fond of the odd doughnut I suspect that paintbrush wielding centre back Jody Craddock cannot trace his lineage back to Fanny and Johnny. I’ll need to check that out on spuriousancestry.com first though.
And finally, there is nothing to suggest that 90’s icons Mark Angel and Brett Angell are in fact identical twins nor that they are somehow related to actor Henry Travers who is best remembered for playing Clarence in the 1940’s Frank Capra film “It’s a Wonderful Life”.
What about renowned hard man Kevin Ball and trumpeter Kenny? Both puffed their cheeks out a lot.
Is speedy winger Tony Cullen a close relative of singer and pianist Jamie Cullen? Could Jamie put the ball into the crowd as well as Tony did?
Both Gordon Armstrong, the man who scored the golden header against Chelsea and Alexander Armstrong, host of Newcastle United’s favourite game, Pointless, hail from the toon opposite Gateshead. Surely a familial connection there.
Is Andy Melville a descendant of the American author Herman, the man who wrote Moby Dick? I asked a girlfriend if she wanted to go and see the film. “Oh no,” came the reply. “I don’t like sex films. I told her it was about whales. “That’s even worse. I can’t stand the Welsh.”
Could Rafa Benitez be related to Lawrie McMenemy? Let’s hope so……….
Being related to Tony Cullen might explain why Jamie’s stage name is Cullum then.
Any connection between Bonnie Prince Charlie Stuart and Denis?
Debra Kerr and little Bobby?
Fergal and Nicky?
Nial and the Eskimo?
Kevin and the famous screwdriver?
By the way , Charlie used to go to the same church as me and would certainly not have done the things suggested above.
She looks nothing like him anyway.
no, he’s much better looking
I did hear that Dennis Wise was related to the Cockney Wanker of Viz fame…but I could be wrong.
No Eric, you’re not wrong. And I have it on good authority that Liz Hurley is the love child of our very own King Charlie, the result of a late night back lane knee-trembler that occurred after we’d played Fulham away season 64-65. When I say I have it on good authority I mean a bloke told me, so M. Salut may want to prime his crack team of lawyers in anticipation of the probable ensuing lawsuit.
Tell that bloke to do his research. It was actually after Blackpool away on 26 Sep 64 (check her birth date). Charlie scored in a 3-1 defeat and according to that bloke scored again later.
I stand corrected Eric, you can call off the lawyers M. Salut!
OK, North American then, but with links to Shildon.
Another American connection is Alan Hope’s dad Bob, who made some memorable ” Road ” films with Malcolm Crosby’s father, Bing.
And I think Danny Collins paternal Grandma Joan starred in the last one “The Road to Hong Kong” when Dorothy Lamour was unavailable.
You are absolutely correct Malcolm. I’d forgotten that.
Dorothy was otherwise engaged making a film with James Stewart, who of course, was Marcus’s granddad.
I was pleased to note that Marcus’s brother, Rod, has recently been knighted.
Has Mr. Sixsmith any connection to Ron Sexsmith, american singer-songwriter? I’m sure I read somewhere that Jimmy is the son of Field-marshall Bernard. And was Tessie John O’shea’s mum? (for our older readers)
American??!! Ron Sexsmith is and always has been Canadian. He lives in Toronto.
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