Chapman Report: picking up points on the A1, not at Manchester United

Robert Chapman on the soapbox from Old Trafford
Bob Chapman on the soapbox from Old Trafford

Colin Randall writes: I’m never sure whether to elevate Bob Chapman to Robert for these post-match essays in Sixer’s place. I always greet him as Bob at matches, but maybe it should be different for Chapman Reports. Robert or Bob, he once again steps boldly into Mr Sixsmith’s shoes to tell us how it really was at Old Trafford, as viewed from the noisy away end. Arrogant Man Utd fans, notably of the faraway-across-the-world variety, reacted with typical contempt to my own report at ESPN (Sunderland=garbage, Poyet’s tactics=very negative) and it was hard to quarrel. Bob sees things in rather less damning terms; for his commendable loyalty and stamina alone, this home-and-away regular really has a strong case for asking SAFC to reimburse his speeding fines …

Read moreChapman Report: picking up points on the A1, not at Manchester United

Fulham v SAFC – The Chapman Report: no disaster in Titanic fixture

SBOXFULHAM (2)Malcolm Dawson writes…..For this and the next few weeks a few lucky adolescents on North Teeside are the beneficiaries of Peter Sixsmith‘s years of experience of teaching History in his idiosyncratic style. “Does Magna Carta mean nothing to you? Did she die in vain?” (Click here to put into context!)

And here for the whole thing!

He wasn’t there at Craven Cottage but he kept up with events via Benno and Barnes and numerous texts from those who were, thus flummoxing John McCormick with his customary Seven. But you can’t do a match report second hand and so it is the fine figure of Bob Chapman stepping into the breach and onto the soapbox to bring us his take on the events from a chilly West London. Bob had to do a day’s work today but here is his view of Tuesday night’s win.

Robert Chapman on the soapbox from Craven Cottage
Robert Chapman on the soapbox from Craven Cottage

FULHAM 1 SAFC 3 – FA CUP REPLAY CRAVEN COTTAGE

Working in Bedford, I am in the fortunate position that I can travel to watch Sunderland during the working week. With a speedy escape from school, out of the door even before the kids have their coats on, I can get to most grounds in the country ready for an evening kick-off. I even made it to Exeter for a League Cup match 25 years ago, although that would be impossible today with the state of the current motorways.

So getting to Fulham on a Tuesday evening posed no problem whatsoever. I didn’t need to be first out of the door and even had time to set my year 7 class their homework on the science of icebergs and their role in the sinking of the Titanic. (Bet that went down well! MD)

Picking Mick up round the corner we headed for Bedford station for the train to St. Pancras. By the time some of my students would have arrived home, we were both sat down in The White Horse on Parsons Green. I invariably drink in this pub for both Fulham and Chelsea matches as it has its own micro-brewery and serves a good selection of guest beers. I decided on a pint of First Class made by the Titanic Brewery. (Bet that went down well! MD)

Mick had an obscure lager and we found ourselves without any change out of a tenner! London is a different world. With the amount of money they are charging it’s no wonder that this pub can afford to have patio heaters on full blast at 5.30 on a freezing cold winter’s evening and nobody sat outside. We had a couple of pints and discussed, because of the expense, whether it would be appropriate for a couple of middle aged men to get involved in an old student activity and in Mick’s case an army activity of ‘minesweeping’. I suppose it’s technically not legal but neither of us like seeing beer wasted! We decided against and left – back towards the underground station, past an estate agent with flats to rent from £3000 per week. London is a different world!

With a couple of pints of Titanic inside, a full moon and a cold northerly wind, I was hoping that we were not going to be hit by an iceberg and an exit from the cup. Although the match at the SOL had been awful I was confident that we would get a result tonight and I was even more convinced when a really strong attacking side had been selected, with Defoe and Wickham upfront supported by Giaccherini and Alvarez. Like the majority I was surprised to see Fletcher appear rather than Wickham. I like both of them. They both have good technique but are very different players. Gus will have to make difficult choices as to who plays up top with Defoe.

Walking up from Putney Bridge station it was evident that there was going to be a good turnout. The only disappointment being the “Steven Taylor” chants that you hear at every away match. A steward told me inside that they were expecting up to 4000 and that he liked us because we are never any trouble.

Jake says: Phew - We're through!
Jake says: Phew – We’re through!

The game started and within 30 seconds Alvarez had made a strong tracking back run, to alleviate Fulham’s opening gambit. I thought to myself, that Poyet must have told him that if he is to play regularly he would have to improve the defensive side of his game. This was a good sign and from the start we began to dominate the game. I lost count of the number of corners we had in the first 20 minutes and was beginning to think that just like the Titanic we were unsinkable and it was just a matter of time before we scored. Then in 28th minute, against the run of play we hit that iceberg! A McCormack corner caused a scramble in the box and Rodallega put it away off the crossbar. They didn’t deserve it to be honest, but you have to defend properly if you are going to win games.

However, the usual post conceding goal slump didn’t materialise and we continued to dominate. We were playing really well as a team and our quietest player was Defoe. Giaccherini, Alvarez, Van Aanholt were all having good games, causing all sorts of problems down the flanks for Fulham. However there was no breakthrough and I was beginning to worry at half time. That continued into the second half and I began to really worry when PvA missed an easy chance early on.

With a lingering depression beginning to kick in at the thought of meeting up with a Fulham supporting A level student next day at school, Fulham hit the iceberg! Bettinelli had the easiest of tasks collecting a high loose ball, but allowed it to slip from his grasp and it went over the line. With goals like that you always assume that there must have been something dodgy and double check with yourself before celebrating. Even at my age I don’t want to look a fool!

Nothing to worry about and it was game on for the win. Alvarez had been outstanding throughout the match.

Jake: 'you're so fine, you're so fine you blow my mind'
Jake: ‘you’re so fine, you’re so fine you blow my mind’
Even though the Fulham players were doubling up on him they couldn’t contain him as he demonstrated his international class. With 15 minutes to go he cut in from the right wing beating players and unleashed a shot that flew into the net. A goal of real quality and let’s hope one of many to come. He has the potential to change our season, just like Borini did last year. Remember, Borini couldn’t get a regular start, just like Alvarez, when he first arrived.

Another plus has to be the form of Danny Graham. He seems sharp and has done well in all the substitute appearances he has made. He made a good run in the final minute to win the penalty which finally sealed the game. So with the game won and not feeling the cold it was a pleasant walk back to Putney Bridge station. It was great to hear the chant changed from one about Steven Taylor to that of “Cheesy Chips down Wembley Way!”

The Chapman Report from Aston Villa: lots of beer, glimmers of hope

Jake presents Bob Chapman, a Sixer supersub
Jake presents Bob Chapman, a Sixer supersub

Once again, Robert Chapman steps smartly into Sixer’s outsized boots to cover for the great man’s latest act of truancy, preferring a squashed ball international to a somewhat lower scoring game of real football at Villa Park …

Read moreThe Chapman Report from Aston Villa: lots of beer, glimmers of hope

The Chapman Report from Swansea: relegation a no-brainer for this shower

Jake presents Bob Chapman, a Sixer supersub
Jake presents Bob Chapman, a Sixer supersub

When Pete Sixsmith misses a game, or at any rate a Sunderland game (he was at Shildon versus Durham suffering news from Swansea by text and Benno/Barnes on BBC Radio Newcastle), the stand-in is often Bob Chapman. Needless to say the poor chap, a home-and-away regular probably since time began, found this one an agonising exercise …

Read moreThe Chapman Report from Swansea: relegation a no-brainer for this shower

The Chapman Report from Aston Villa: sheer agony on a night to forget

Jake's view of the subs' bench
Jake’s view of the subs’ bench

It is tempting to draw a veil over the whole sorry night. As Jimmy Montgomery put it, in 40th anniversary-themed conversation with Monsieur Salut, what was remarkable was that so many players chose to have such catastrophically poor games. And Bob Chapman was left to ponder – even more painfully than most of us – the wisdom of trailing around the country in support of Sunderland ….

Read moreThe Chapman Report from Aston Villa: sheer agony on a night to forget

Sixers Sevens: Aston Villa 6 SAFC 1: Paulo’s boys punished by resurgent Villa

Jake poin Sixer to the wall
Jake captures Sixer’s wall of strength

…The mood going into this game was positive and after the last two victories there was justified cause for optimism. This was to be our Champions League Final, the three points ensuring another year of Premiership football. As Sunderland fans we should know better than to get over excited and tonight showed why. This is the part where Pete Sixsmith usually shares his seven word summation of the game but instead he spent this evening watching Shildon in the Northern League. Good choice! Here’s the supersub’s verdict.

Read moreSixers Sevens: Aston Villa 6 SAFC 1: Paulo’s boys punished by resurgent Villa

The Chapman Report from Chelsea: must do (even) better

Jake's your man, Bob, if young David still needs help with art
Jake’s your man, Bob, if young David still needs help with art

Jamie Redknapp’s bits-and-bobs column in the Mail made depressing reading. ‘Will they (Newcastle) send Sunderland closer to the drop next week? … At Chelsea, PDC went for Wickham to lead the line – a young player I like – and he played well. But I worry where their goals are coming from.’ But there is hope. Robert Chapman is a home-and-away stalwart and left Stamford Bridge feeling a little perkier. Let’s hope his assessment proves truer than Young Redknapp’s and that PDC’s powers of motivation, and his own home tutorial skills with Young David, prevail …

Read moreThe Chapman Report from Chelsea: must do (even) better

Sixer’s Sevens: Chelsea 2 SAFC 1 – reasons to be cheerful?

Jake gives Sixer star billing
Jake gives Sixer star billing

This is where Pete Sixsmith records his instant verdict, in seven words, on each Sunderland game. The result went to script but PDC can take heart from a performance that was far better than most this year. Two wicked deflections cost us; we can but hope that the decent display fires the team for the coming tasks, starting at Newcastle United. This is a quick, emergency and no-frills posting of Sevens and Bob Chapman is the supersub in Sixer’s absence from the game

Read moreSixer’s Sevens: Chelsea 2 SAFC 1 – reasons to be cheerful?

The Chapman Report from QPR: watching SAFC needs a government health warning

Bob gets his very own graphic, courtesy of Jake
Jake asks Bob: a day to remember?

Bob Chapman once again fills Sixer’s outsized shoes to report on a game the master chose to miss. It started as a day when Bob and a friend would impress two young Aussie women with a scintillating show by Sunderland preceded by the delights of a west London gastro-pub. Something went wrong; they endured takeaway KFCs in a foodless boozer near the Bush and the poor Aussies may never set foot in another football ground. Meanwhile, Bob was left feeling there’s something damaging to the health in watching SAFC at this stage of a season …

Read moreThe Chapman Report from QPR: watching SAFC needs a government health warning

The Chapman Report: script rewritten by defensive calamities at Reading and Newcastle’s comeback

Bob gets his very own graphic, courtesy of Jake
Bob gets his very own graphic, courtesy of Jake

Into Sixer’s shoes once again steps Bob Chapman‘s, our star writer having maintained his pickiness with long away trips (and even a few short home ones). Jon Keen, who writes for the Reading pages at ESPN, thought Sunderland ‘the worst team to visit the MadStad this season’. Supersub Bob could not see us losing from the moment Gardner struck home his penalty equaliser, just as many expected a comfortable Chelsea cruise once they went ahead at St James’ Park. Instead, characteristic defensive lapses and unconvincing finishing by SAFC, and Chelsea’s surrender on Tyneside, left him fearing the worst for his ‘Sunderland eighth, NUFC relegated’ pre-season wager …

Read moreThe Chapman Report: script rewritten by defensive calamities at Reading and Newcastle’s comeback