Jake: ‘save yourself from a lifetime of misery, Keir’
Everton fans who stray here looking for our player-by-player review of their side will be disappointed. This is the slot where Keir Bradwell sums up the contributions of Sunderland’s team, as seen through a 13-year-old’s eyes, and awards marks out of 10 …
Sunderland 0 – 1 Everton: Player Ratings
Vito Mannone – 5
Not the best. A wobbly performance in which he was quite erratic at times. Other than that, made some good saves, as usual.
Phil Bardsley – 6
Did reasonably well, attacking down that right-hand side. Occasionally broke up play by being either too slow or too sloppy with his passing, but still managed to get forward, which helped us in attack a great deal. Marcos Alonso – 5
Was inconsistent in defence, brilliant one minute and woeful the next. Let Deulofeu through to cross the ball into Wes Brown, who, as usual, finished the chance with clinical precision, so you could argue Alonso was at fault for the goal. Wes Brown – 3
We should really play him up front. He scores so many goals! In all seriousness, he was unlucky, but this keeps happening. As I’ve said before, he’s fast becoming a liability.
… I can live with yet another of the relegations in my many decades as a fan. Loyalty to the club does not depend, for proper supporters, on which league it currently inhabits. But relegations are a lot more endurable if they are accompanied by genuine belief in the possibility of an immediate or swift bounceback. I await the least evidence of such hope being justified.
John O’Shea – 6
Did well. Had a fairly solid game in which he achieved little but didn’t get outdone by Everton’s ridiculously good attack. Lee Cattermole – 8
Rather good, I thought. Linked up the play from defence into midfield excellently. What really blew me away though, were the phenomenal tackles on Everton’s midfield, which were on the whole brilliantly timed and almost always won us the ball. Jack Colback – 5
Jack Colback broke up so many Sunderland attacks through waylaid passes and his lack of pace, that it seemed clear (to me, at least) that he didn’t want to play for us anymore. I think Giaccherini should play instead of him, in a midfield three. He played in a similar position at Juventus. Ki Sung-Yueng – 6
Shoot! How many times will Ki get into a brilliant goal-scoring position but not have a shot at goal? Excellent, usually, in passing the ball around, but offers no attacking threat himself, other than the possibility of an assist. Adam Johnson – 6
Affected the game sporadically, sometimes getting involved but often not, instead standing around huffing and puffing. Fabio Borini – 7
Showed the best work rate I think I’ve ever seen in a Sunderland shirt. Ran after every loose ball, harried the defenders and goalkeeper down constantly, 90 minutes long. His end product still needs improving, but the effort shown was immense. Connor Wickham – 6
I firmly believe Rylan will be a brilliant striker next year in the Championship, he’s still only 21 and yet is starting to show good skill and technique. Needs to influence the game more, though. Doesn’t get involved enough. Seb Larsson – 5
Point point point, moan moan moan, point point point, whine whine whine, touch the ball, give it away, point point point, moan moan moan. Man of the Match: Lee Cattermole
Once Borini becomes more clinical, he’ll walk away with this title at whatever club he plays at. For now though, he isn’t, and Lee Cattermole was outstanding in patrolling the field and breaking up Everton’s play.
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